Friday Fictioneers: Just now

“Could you hang up this picture ?” “Yes.” Sands whooshing through the hourglass. “I don’t want to nag, but you are going hang the picture, aren’t you?” “Yes.” Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick. “Nevermind. I can do it.” “Uh huh.” Bang. Swearing. Smashing. More swearing. “What in the name of all that’s holy are you […]

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Friday Fictioneers: Call a cab

Take a taxi they said. They go everywhere fast. They’re reliable. Everyone uses them. Everyone. Including their extended family, a gaggle of geese, a stable of horses and their mother in law. There’s always room for one more. Somehow. It defies known physics. I was the one more. The last sardine. A chicken pooped on […]

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Friday Fictioneers: Dog days

Every day. I can’t take it anymore. Today I will catch him in the act. I will get my revenge. I’ve had enough of this horrible hound doing a full day’s business on my lawn. He’s a poop ninja. I’m going to hide behind this bush and wait for the opportune moment to exact my […]

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Friday Fictioneers: It bites

The sad one: She played as if she had the devil in her. She danced across the ivories, her head thrown back and sweat glistening on her brow. She played until her fingers bled, literally. She played until the audience had quietly filed out of the concert hall. She played until the men came with […]

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Friday Fictioneers: Where, oh where can it be?

Where, oh where did my Tupperware go? Where, oh where can it be? With its lid long lost And its bottom long gone Where, oh where can it be? Where, oh where did my Tupperware go? Somewhere far from me? I have a lid right here But no bottom in sight Where, oh where can […]

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Friday Fictioneers: The big fish

The old men sat in quiet comradery, sipping tall glasses of lager and reminiscing. “Did I tell you about the time I caught a shark?” asked Jack. The assembled company sighed. They’d heard it before and didn’t believe anymore upon its frequent retelling. “I was fishing at the pier, when all of a sudden my […]

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Friday Fictioneers: When they came

I was sulking. A proper adolescent sulk. I was sitting on the bleachers really aiming for the depths of teenage despair. Then the light came. And them. Suddenly, I realized that the world wasn’t really ours. It wasn’t like the movies. They weren’t green. They didn’t come in peace. They sure as hell weren’t Vulcan. […]

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Friday Fictioneers: Headgames

“Where are my glasses?” in desperation. “No idea,” smirking. “I can’t see anything!” “Clearly,” with a tinge of ill-timed humour. Crash! “Bugger! I’ve broken something.” Stomp. Glass shattering. “I’ve stepped on them, haven’t I?” “No. Just that ugly vase your mother bought.” “Good. Help me retrace my steps.” “Am I a guide dog now?” the […]

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