V is for Very Smart Aleck

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Very clever people can occasionally say very stupid things.

The husband has been officially declared very clever.

He completed a complicated leadership training programme at his company and was told today he has an enormously high IQ.

He was also told that he is borderline egocentric.

2012-02-05-ALBERT-EINSTEIN-everybody-is-a-geniusWhen I subtly expressed my concern over whether or not telling him this was in fact a Good Thing, he immediately required an explanation.

I tried the: “How do you know when someone has got an MBA?” question.

Talk about a lead balloon.

This is what he said…

“I may not as rich as Bill Gates. I may not have discovered the cure for cancer, but at least I can say I am cleverer than most people.”

A little over the egocentric edge?

I thought I’d let it slide.

Then he went on…

john-ruskin-genius-is-only-a-superior-power-of-seeing-timetokickbuts-share-a-luv-kick“When you have something, some edge, something you’re proud of don’t want to tell people about it? Like if you’re a brilliant actor or the next Stephen Hawking? It’s like… it’s like… your boobs”

Hang on. Did he just say that?

My boobs?

In the same sentence as Bill Gates and Stephen Hawking, rich men and medical geniuses, the best he could up with about me was my BOOBS?

He carried on, “I mean don’t you wake up in the morning, look at yourself in the mirror and just think, wow I have stupendous boobs?”

Well, no actually I don’t.

Theres-a-fine-line-between-genius-and-insanity-Oscar-Levant-copy-700x525I exploded in equal parts mirth and disbelief.

“That’s what you think is my greatest asset, what defines me as a person? Not my brilliant writing skills, or my creative advertising genius? But my boobs!”

“Well yes,” he said, “They’re the first thing I noticed about you.”

Now it is hard to get worked up and righteously upset when a man who has been married to you for almost 13 years tells you your boobs are stupendous.

But still…

I’m struggling to wrap my head around it.

“The-difference-between-genius-copy-700x525Should I be flattered or insulted?

I hope I am more than the sum of my boobs.

I’d like to think I was pretty clever too.

I was going to write about the vicious smell emanating from the bottom of the garden, but this totally blindsided me.

PS: Boobs is a very funny word. It’s word that men never grow out of. Try throwing it in to conversations with men randomly. No matter how serious they are they will laugh. They can’t help it.

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17 thoughts on “V is for Very Smart Aleck

  1. Funny and smart – you should consider yourself lucky! (hahaha apologies if I inflated his ego any more than it already is) My point is, I imagine that his comment wasn’t malicious. Funny stuff – definitely get yourself some retail therapy out of it!

  2. This is so not ‘exactly’ how it transpired. Grrrr …….

    Makes MR Right sound a little, well, visually orientated. And this from the 18 yr old girl with the Pepsi T shirt, “come on come on drink it” emblazoned across the front, bottle top strategically positioned and the Pepsi gushing out all over the place. Of course he would notice that first. It’s human nature.

  3. Your post was quite amusing. 🙂 Boobs is a funny word. I think I would be beyond insulted if someone thought my boobs were my greatest asset, especially since after having kids, my boobs are far from stupendous.

    Have fun with a-z. 🙂

  4. Pretty much a backhanded compliment there… but maybe it was your husband’s egocentric behaviour that only his version of the world was important – hence the boobs… Still we appreciate your brilliant writing skills, if that helps!

    • Backhanded! Not really. Context and Intention mean a lot I believe. Writing somehow lacks the ability to convey intention at times.

      And yes my version of the world contains boobs, lots of them. Also apples, oranges and cars. Books, blogs and passports.

  5. I think it is a combo too – flattering and insulting. Men are man children and at times you just have to go with it and if that does not work retail therapy is great! Have a Great One:)

  6. I would be both flattered and insulted. My hubby and I have been married 7 years and I will admit that I’m glad he still likes my physical attributes. However, I am way more than boobs, so therefore I would be a wee bit pissed off if like you said, he didn’t mention “my brilliant writing skills” or in my case, my ability to get on the same level as children of any age or my vast book/factoid knowledge.

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